While we can’t control what other people do or say, we can control how we react to it. We can choose that we can internalize what it means to take something personally and that we can ignore. Anyone can learn to stop taking things personally and eliminate the stress and anxiety that comes with it.
Although not taking things personally is not natural, this skill must be honed. Please pay close attention because we will give you three essential tips on stopping taking things personally.
Question Your Own Perfectionism
Many of the people who take things personally focus on avoiding failure and harsh judgments, because they often work so hard to be flawless and excellent so that no one criticizes them. They are very disappointed when they receive negative feedback because they feel that all the effort is wasted.
What you can do is rephrase your reaction in various ways. One is to have a better reception of feedback on your perfectionism. It would be best if you were a winner when dealing with comments and standing up to the haters.
Another assertive way is to change your perfectionism; this takes work and dedication. Have more compassion for yourself and realize that you can’t always be perfect. Learn to accept yourself and know your value. Remember that you are enough just the way you are and that specific people will value you as a person.
Realize It’s Not About You
Here I want to give you an important fact; although it may seem personal, people rarely do things for you; they do something for them, for their desires and needs. Many behaviors and reactions have to do with your perspectives and responses. Therefore, in challenging situations, you must see from the point of view of the other.
Refrain from jumping to conclusions; first, ask yourself what else this could mean. Can there be another explanation for this person’s words and actions? Try to see something positive in the other person’s intention. This way, you can see the situation objectively, putting understanding first instead of irritation or annoyance.
Remember that everyone has emotional issues and is dealing with them; people can often become rude, defiant, and thoughtless. They may be doing the best they can, or they may not even be aware of their problems. What you can do is learn not to interpret other people’s behaviors as personal attacks and respond to them with grace or not at all.
Question To Clarify
Avoid negative assumptions because, in this way, you can create misunderstandings and conflicts. Feel free to ask the person who meant it if you have any doubts. Please allow them to repeat or elaborate on their ideas.
It is essential to do it assertively without being too emotional, blaming the other person, or triggering reactions in other people. When you do that, you can increase the chance that they will understand you and consider your needs.
